|The 7th page of annoying junk that no one wants!
Mutant Gear now irritates even more people with a 7th page of supid looking dolls and other lame items made in Sonic's name. Bad design, rotten quality, poor products, and terrible likenesses will abound. Help stamp out this bad junk by refusing to buy it! Remember: when mutant makers don't get money, they won't make more mutants. However, when you don't have it, you can come here to make fun of it!
|Sonic Gear Main * Mutant Gear Page 1 * Mutant Gear Page 2 * Mutant Gear 3 * Mutant Gear 4 * Mutant Gear 5 * Mutant Gear 6 * Calander of Crud *|
|Companies that make ordinary dolls are capable of making muntats, too--as News Power proves here.
This is an old, small size Sonic plush from the Chinese company (it's made in China, FOR China) "News Power. They have several sizes of ordinary Sonic plushes, but for some reason, one of their older ones is a mutant. Bad quality starts at the top, with innacurate, floppy felt single row of spikes. Then, the eyes are sewn on upside-down so it looks scary/bad. The glove cuffs are off the gloves, showing the arm color in between.
|The hands are mutant too, look how big and fin-like the 'palm'?? area is on the pinky-side of the hand. They're shaped like little footballs or something. The loose socks have the same problem as the cuffs. The body/belly dot is also pretty wide, making him look fat because of the short legs. It's just not a very good doll, but the company did prove later on that it could do better. Photo by Pichu97/Charlie|
|A mutant movie?
You bet. The super stupor "Sonic Movie" that's supposed to arrive in 2019, and features a bad #notmysonic redesign gets a mutant poster to start things off.
Where does it look like the camera is?
It looks like it's in someone's crotch, taking a picture from between naked legs on top of the bridge.
This is one of those instances where "what they were going for" and "what they got" are 2 quite different things. This is the famous Golden Gate bridge, of course, with that blue 'speed trail' or whatever from the 'sonic' in the poster. It's supposed to put the viewer into his perspective with the shot, looking back as he relaxes atop a pillar, seeing his own trail of where he's been.* However, it doesn't look that way at first glance.
|They wanted 'a go-pro' or forehead camera look, but with the troll-like creature's proportions, the head would have to be level with the knee or below it (which it wouldn't, the head is big) to get the shot. So, at worst it's a crotch-cam, and at best it's just an awkward looking junk.|
|*It's a stink trail. That big line is all stench lines, all up in a big, blue row.
Did you get angry at the gross looking red shoes here?
|A Mutant Controller?
Well...why not, says quality control. Certainly, electronics errors can happen...but they are less common than errors in plush, art, or figures because electronics generally have another layer of quality control. (meaning they have to actually DO something aside from exist & look ok) In this case, it's the buttons, you can clearly see that there's
|TWO of button 'a', and the second one (at the bottom) is rotated 90 degrees. The letter buttons probably all had different backs so they'd fit into the different 'slots' on the circuit card inside, and when this one wouldn't go (Because of course it was wrong, it was the second one of 'a') they turned it sideways and called it a day.
This was, sadly, bought "new in the box" which you can see there is the European one (spells colours) so the error / mutant was only seen once it's too late and the box was opened. Which is really too bad, because this controller isn't that common any more because Sonic Colors was for the original Wii which has been gone for a while now. Because the traditional Wiimote wasn't the best for a game like Colors, of course Sega would want to step in with something Sonic to make the game easier and more fun to play.
The controller still works, and the button will still press, but it just doesn't look as nice.Fortunately, mutations like this in costly items aren't as common. Photo & owned by Hedgy
|Yeah ok this thing is just terrible at any size.
Here comes the dumb with this Terrible Tails from Australia's Sega World Sydney. They made him in 3 or 4 sizes and they're all just as bad as the next. This one happens to be the largest size. (Small is pictured elsewhere on mutant gear) Any time someone sees one of these, it can easily be wondered if whoever made it had ever seen a picture of Tails. About the only thing that's NOT wrong with it is that at the least he's not brown.
The list includes 1. Big Body 2. Folded ears with no border 3. white bangs 4. very wrong stupid plastic eyes 5. eyebrows 6. wrong shape nose 7. center nose line that splits the upper lip 8. huge lower face 9. stupid wrong smile 10. mitten hands without fingers 11. rounded shoe tips 12. wrong zig-zag top to the belly dot 13. poor choice hairy fur at bottom of face.
Of course, poorly proportions and cheaply done uplifting glove-cuffs join the fray but 13 things on 1 very off-model plush doll? They could hardly pack in more mistakes if they tried. What's even MORE mystifying is that they had to go out of their way to ADD ERRORS to the doll to make it WORSE. Eyebrows? Center split lip?
|If you're making something cheap (like a bootlegger) you cut details like making mitten hands...so why nix the fingers but then waste time on eyebrows and split lips? This isn't even like how SWS was trying to change Sonic to the blue-arm version or deny Eggman exists = only AOSTH Robotnick, either, their art/whatever else of Tails always seemed to be era-typical stuff or SAT AM style stuff, so the doll becomes even more of a mystery as to why it is how it is. Photo & owned by|